MadameBastet-Firing-Neurons

Feline Famine

Ladies and gentlemen, we've all seen it.
The horrific famine happening as we sit in
the comfort of our own homes...in Darfur, in
Niger...bulging bellies, shrunken, tiny forms,
heart-breaking images of starvation that haunt
us and seemingly never end.

However there is a little known crisis and situation
happening right here in America. It could be happening
in your own home. It's feline famine. Yes, it may not
be as obvious as the crises in Africa, but it's real.
We don't see bloated bellies, or flies crawling on faces.
We HEAR the agony of these poor creatures...
deprived of food sometimes as long as two or even three
hours. We hear the insane meowing, the wailing, the howling;
we are forced to watch the hideous pacing back and forth
in the kitchen. Their eyes are WIDE with stunned shock
and horror. We know what they're thinking. They are
thinking, "WHERE IN THE HELL IS MY BOWL OF
KIBBLE YOU BITCH!" Why, why, why did you take away
that last bit of dried, crusty wet food I could've eaten!
Oh god, is that food? No. A piece of lint. Well, as a last resort...

The images are often so heart-wrenching we must look
away. They walk about, unstable, dizzy, they collapse
onto the bed, onto your 1000 thread count sheets and
gaze at you with huge, sad eyes, pleading eyes that say:
I AM STARVING WENCH!! I have not eaten in three hours.
I need, at the very least, a Temptations treat. What are
you, a sadist? Come on woman, I'm not gonna make
it here. I'm losing the will to live.......

Zoe, my beloved child, was going to have dental surgery this
morning. I kept ALL food away from both cats after 8pm last
night for fear she would eat something. Fletcher barely made
it through the night. I thought about hooking her up to an
emergency saline IV drip. Chicken-flavoured saline. Available
now at a pet store near you in case of these emergencies.
Zoe paced and cried. She hadn't eaten her dinner by 8pm but
it was too late. I could see her shrinking through the night.
In the morning, like a bag of bones, my poor children weak and
dazed, watched me get ready. Fletcher howled in the kitchen.

Then. Fletcher screams louder. It was the crack of dawn; I had
to take Zoe in for surgery. She hides under the couch. She
knows what's about to go down. I'm almost ready to go.
I take a stupid risk and let Fletcher eat some dry food in
the kitchen just to get her out of my incredibly thick and
beautiful hair and SHUT HER UP. Then I see it. Oh god. No.

ZOE! Zoe is in the kitchen near the dry food. DAMMIT!
I didn't catch her in time. My fault. She was so hungry her
hunger overcame her fear and she crawled out from beneath
the couch. I have no idea if she ate any dry food. I don't think
so. I call the vet. They have to reschedule the surgery for
Friday. FUCKING CAT!

No. I cannot blame the cat. It was I who stupidly thought I
could get her in the carrier before she saw the food. I made a
grave miscalculation. And now, here I sit, early in the morning,
dressed, light make-up on, and I finally was able to feed both
cats. Two whole cans of wet food! A big bowl of kibble! Come on,
stuff your sad, skeletal, sunken faces! It warmed the cockles
of my heart to see them chowing down so heartily. And just what
are cockles anyway? Greedy monsters.

Feline famine folks. It's real. It's here. It's a crisis too
often ignored. Please, please, give if you can. Anything.
A can of Fancy Feast. Note: My strange cats hate all fish.
No salmon or tuna. They prefer chicken and turkey. Beef
as a last resort. The only kibble they will eat is Deli Cat.
We're accepting donations until the end of the year.

DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT! I had my day all
planned out. I wanted to get this surgery over with.
Now we alllllllllll have to wait until Friday. I will NOT
make this stupid mistake again and leave any food out
while trying to get Zoe ready. Hunger beat fear. And now
their bellies full and distended, worn out and tired from
several hours without access to any food, they collapse
in a sleepy heap on the bed and sleep like the dead. All
is well in the world now. They have eaten. An in an hour
they will eat again. Speaking of food, I'm up now....going out
for breakfast doesn't sound half bad. Hmmmm.....

Photos of the famine: Oh get real, do these two look like they're starving?