Tomorrow is D-Day
At 1:30 p.m. I am set to take my final two English exams. Wish me luck. I'm going to need it this time. And yes, I said 1:30 p.m. They use the same high school for other exams between 8am and 1 p.m. Lucky me - I get to sleep in - if I sleep at all.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Happy Three Year Blog Anniversary Baybee!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just looked at my blog and realized I began writing it on March 12, 2006. And this is my 200th blog. Whooooooohooooooooo! 2006 seems like a whole other lifetime. I hadn't even started The Evil Program That Almost Destroyed Me. I hadn't worked at The Evil Elementary School With Spoiled, Psychotic Children. My life was quite different. But I am done with all that crap and so much happier than I was 3 years ago. I'm still mired in exams and looking for a job but I have more hope and a better outlook that I did in 2006, 2007 and 2008.
The wilderness years. I seem to go through a lot of them.
I'm burning CD's and avoiding my linguistics book. I'm so burned out (no pun intended) on studying. Fried brains. I wish it was all over!
I read on SK's blog the Church have cancelled concerts due to 'illness in the band.' That is kind of concerning. I don't know the Church to be the kind of band that often, if ever, cancels concerts. I wonder what's happening. Whatever it is, I hope it isn't too serious.
S and I are talking about seeing the band together. Frankly that'd be awesome but more awesome would just be hanging out with S again! It's been 2 and 1/2 years. Too long!
Ha, now that I've been mired in linguistics I look at every word I type and think it looks funny and wonder how it got to be the way it is. The Great Vowel Shift? The Black Death? You'd be amazed at the things that have shaped the English language. I rather enjoy reading up on linguistics; I just don't enjoy being FORCED to take a test on it.
OMG, I had the worst - I mean the WORST insomnia last night. I even took the full two Tylenol PM and didn't go to sleep until almost 6 am. Why? I don't fucking have a clue. I've been watching my caffeine intake like a hawk. It really is its own form of hell, insomnia. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemies. Well, there are some people I might wish a few sleepless nights on. Hee.
I just looked at my blog and realized I began writing it on March 12, 2006. And this is my 200th blog. Whooooooohooooooooo! 2006 seems like a whole other lifetime. I hadn't even started The Evil Program That Almost Destroyed Me. I hadn't worked at The Evil Elementary School With Spoiled, Psychotic Children. My life was quite different. But I am done with all that crap and so much happier than I was 3 years ago. I'm still mired in exams and looking for a job but I have more hope and a better outlook that I did in 2006, 2007 and 2008.
The wilderness years. I seem to go through a lot of them.
I'm burning CD's and avoiding my linguistics book. I'm so burned out (no pun intended) on studying. Fried brains. I wish it was all over!
I read on SK's blog the Church have cancelled concerts due to 'illness in the band.' That is kind of concerning. I don't know the Church to be the kind of band that often, if ever, cancels concerts. I wonder what's happening. Whatever it is, I hope it isn't too serious.
S and I are talking about seeing the band together. Frankly that'd be awesome but more awesome would just be hanging out with S again! It's been 2 and 1/2 years. Too long!
Ha, now that I've been mired in linguistics I look at every word I type and think it looks funny and wonder how it got to be the way it is. The Great Vowel Shift? The Black Death? You'd be amazed at the things that have shaped the English language. I rather enjoy reading up on linguistics; I just don't enjoy being FORCED to take a test on it.
OMG, I had the worst - I mean the WORST insomnia last night. I even took the full two Tylenol PM and didn't go to sleep until almost 6 am. Why? I don't fucking have a clue. I've been watching my caffeine intake like a hawk. It really is its own form of hell, insomnia. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemies. Well, there are some people I might wish a few sleepless nights on. Hee.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Little Addictions
1. Pepsi - This is one of my worst habits because it's usually NOT diet. I really don't like diet drinks; although oddly right now I am drinking diet Pepsi because it's all I have. My dad used to drink about 7,000 Pepsi's a day, I swear. It's the caffeine AND the sugar I love. Even more the sugar - because I started drinking caffeine-free Pepsi years ago. I can't live without the sugar and yet it's sooooooooooooooooo bad for you.
2. Anything salty, greasy or fried. Is it a wonder I love the food in the South so much? I cannot have these in the house or they're gone in two seconds: Any kind of potato chips, Doritos, pistachio nuts, pretzels, anything you can heat up that's greasy and fried. Donuts too, even though they're sweet.
3. Traveling: I admit, one of the reasons I LOVE being on a school calendar is the time off I get so I can travel. Even to ATLANTA - so I can see my niece. Or to Palm Springs so I can sit by the pool with a fruity drink and relax. I really, really want to go back to Europe but that's not going to happen until I get a full-time job. I hate flying and hate long car trips and yet love going other places - the more foreign the better. I loved Rome sooooooooooooooooo much! I can't wait to go back to Italy. Rome is a wild ride. I want to visit so many countries, especially Ireland, Belgium, Sweden, Switzerland and I desperately want to go back to London.
4. Books: Anyone who knows me well knows my obsession with books and reading. I love everything about books. I could not, nor would I want to, live without books and reading. I love buying books, owning books, going into second-hand bookstores, feeling the pages of ancient books with their oh-so-fragile pages and the smell of history permeating their covers and spines...I have probably bought and read literally thousands and thousands of books since I was 18. I've tried going to libraries but they never have what I want to read or I don't want to be limited to two weeks to keep a book, or I'd take home a book and something scary and gross would be on it. I know I've spent waaaaaay too much money on books. Sometimes I regret it. It's a bitch to move with so many books. So I've had to give away the majority of my collection. Books are your friends. They've kept me sane and kept me entertained and kept me happy my whole life. My biggest thrill in elementary school was going to the library and getting to visit the bookmobile. Judy Blume was my hero. Thank you God, for books.
5. Slot machines: Ok, I know S had this on her list, but seriously, get me near these and I can't stop playing. I used to have more control over myself. I fall into the idiotic category of the gambler who is just POSITIVE the NEXT SPIN is going to be THE ONE where I win big. I'm a moron I know. The house ALWAYS wins. I can't wait to go to Palm Springs. They have a casino across the street from the hotel we're staying at. My mom always abandons me and I can sit at a slot machine for hours, pulling that lever like a dumb-ass monkey in a laboratory. I'm pathetic.
6. Movies: I have probably seen more movies than all my good friends combined. I know there are SERIOUS cinephiles out there I can't even compete with, but I watch a LOT of movies. Growing up, movies were my salvation, alongside books. Can you tell I like escapism? Movies also ruined me. I grew up thinking I'd meet The One across a crowded room, that true love only took about two hours, and that Luke Skywalker was the sexiest man alive. I grew up wondering where the background music was during all my important moments in life. Seriously, movies are still a huge obsession and I don't know anyone who loves them like I do, or watches the ones I watch, over and over, and it's kind of lonely because I have no one to talk to about my movies. I am totally and utterly enamored with what I believe was one of the golden ages of film making - the 1970's. All the great directors - Spielberg, Scorsese, de Palma, Coppoloa, Woody Allen, William Friedkin, etc. were young and brave and doing their best work. So were the great actors of our day - de Niro and Pacino were young and hadn't become sad caricatures of themselves. Recently I saw a movie that I know S loves as well - The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (I think that's it) and it's just gorgeously shot and acted and when I come across a what I feel is a movie with even a tiny bit of greatness to it, I am elevated and taken to a place I can't quite describe. I first remember this happening when I was 10 years old, saw my first James Bond film, and Star Wars. Movie making has ruined me yes, but it's also saved me.
7. Martinis: It all started with the Appletinis at the Polo Lounge. Pure brilliance. Then I started drinking Cosmos, and all kinds of martinis. I think the martini is the height of alcoholic elegance. My new favourite drink is a Sidecar. If you ever get a really great Sidecar, it's like drinking the nectar of the Gods.
8. The Internet: How did I ever live without it? I first got on it via AOL when I was 26. I went 26 whole years without it! I didn't miss it, because I didn't know it existed. Now I can't get off it. It's a drug that just won't let me go. However I've met some of the best friends of my life through it, and for that, I'm eternally grateful.
9. Music: Music was beyond an obsession for me from ages 16 to about 30. After my dad died and I got sick I was on so many mind and soul-numbing drugs I lost touch with music. I remember in college, asking my mom how she just wasn't obsessed with music. I loved it so much I tried to ruin it by going into the music business. I was young and naive. I wanted to be an A and R person. I didn't know that was mostly a male-dominated field - like being a talent scout. At the time I thought I'd want to spend my whole life in smoky clubs around bands. I didn't. But I have re-discovered music and is there anything closer to Heaven?
10. Art: I'd be an idiot if I didn't include this one. I slaved for four years to get a Master's Degree in the history of art. Even if I never teach it again (which would make me sad) I will always be grateful for the knowledge I have. I am moved beyond measure by Caravaggio's Christ, by van Gogh's gorgeous yellows, by Rembrandt's sweet son Titus, by Matisse's dancing nudes, by Berthe Morisot's thick brushstrokes...by Manet's saloon girl, and Monet's haystacks. Going to Europe AFTER I had taught art history for 6 years made the experience so much sweeter for ME. I don't know if other people care - or even know what they're missing by not having so much background info on the artists. Maybe it's like the Internet...you don't miss what you never had. But I think it makes my appreciation of it all so much richer.
That's all for now. I know I have about 20 more addictions and some are worse than others but my fingers are tired.
1. Pepsi - This is one of my worst habits because it's usually NOT diet. I really don't like diet drinks; although oddly right now I am drinking diet Pepsi because it's all I have. My dad used to drink about 7,000 Pepsi's a day, I swear. It's the caffeine AND the sugar I love. Even more the sugar - because I started drinking caffeine-free Pepsi years ago. I can't live without the sugar and yet it's sooooooooooooooooo bad for you.
2. Anything salty, greasy or fried. Is it a wonder I love the food in the South so much? I cannot have these in the house or they're gone in two seconds: Any kind of potato chips, Doritos, pistachio nuts, pretzels, anything you can heat up that's greasy and fried. Donuts too, even though they're sweet.
3. Traveling: I admit, one of the reasons I LOVE being on a school calendar is the time off I get so I can travel. Even to ATLANTA - so I can see my niece. Or to Palm Springs so I can sit by the pool with a fruity drink and relax. I really, really want to go back to Europe but that's not going to happen until I get a full-time job. I hate flying and hate long car trips and yet love going other places - the more foreign the better. I loved Rome sooooooooooooooooo much! I can't wait to go back to Italy. Rome is a wild ride. I want to visit so many countries, especially Ireland, Belgium, Sweden, Switzerland and I desperately want to go back to London.
4. Books: Anyone who knows me well knows my obsession with books and reading. I love everything about books. I could not, nor would I want to, live without books and reading. I love buying books, owning books, going into second-hand bookstores, feeling the pages of ancient books with their oh-so-fragile pages and the smell of history permeating their covers and spines...I have probably bought and read literally thousands and thousands of books since I was 18. I've tried going to libraries but they never have what I want to read or I don't want to be limited to two weeks to keep a book, or I'd take home a book and something scary and gross would be on it. I know I've spent waaaaaay too much money on books. Sometimes I regret it. It's a bitch to move with so many books. So I've had to give away the majority of my collection. Books are your friends. They've kept me sane and kept me entertained and kept me happy my whole life. My biggest thrill in elementary school was going to the library and getting to visit the bookmobile. Judy Blume was my hero. Thank you God, for books.
5. Slot machines: Ok, I know S had this on her list, but seriously, get me near these and I can't stop playing. I used to have more control over myself. I fall into the idiotic category of the gambler who is just POSITIVE the NEXT SPIN is going to be THE ONE where I win big. I'm a moron I know. The house ALWAYS wins. I can't wait to go to Palm Springs. They have a casino across the street from the hotel we're staying at. My mom always abandons me and I can sit at a slot machine for hours, pulling that lever like a dumb-ass monkey in a laboratory. I'm pathetic.
6. Movies: I have probably seen more movies than all my good friends combined. I know there are SERIOUS cinephiles out there I can't even compete with, but I watch a LOT of movies. Growing up, movies were my salvation, alongside books. Can you tell I like escapism? Movies also ruined me. I grew up thinking I'd meet The One across a crowded room, that true love only took about two hours, and that Luke Skywalker was the sexiest man alive. I grew up wondering where the background music was during all my important moments in life. Seriously, movies are still a huge obsession and I don't know anyone who loves them like I do, or watches the ones I watch, over and over, and it's kind of lonely because I have no one to talk to about my movies. I am totally and utterly enamored with what I believe was one of the golden ages of film making - the 1970's. All the great directors - Spielberg, Scorsese, de Palma, Coppoloa, Woody Allen, William Friedkin, etc. were young and brave and doing their best work. So were the great actors of our day - de Niro and Pacino were young and hadn't become sad caricatures of themselves. Recently I saw a movie that I know S loves as well - The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (I think that's it) and it's just gorgeously shot and acted and when I come across a what I feel is a movie with even a tiny bit of greatness to it, I am elevated and taken to a place I can't quite describe. I first remember this happening when I was 10 years old, saw my first James Bond film, and Star Wars. Movie making has ruined me yes, but it's also saved me.
7. Martinis: It all started with the Appletinis at the Polo Lounge. Pure brilliance. Then I started drinking Cosmos, and all kinds of martinis. I think the martini is the height of alcoholic elegance. My new favourite drink is a Sidecar. If you ever get a really great Sidecar, it's like drinking the nectar of the Gods.
8. The Internet: How did I ever live without it? I first got on it via AOL when I was 26. I went 26 whole years without it! I didn't miss it, because I didn't know it existed. Now I can't get off it. It's a drug that just won't let me go. However I've met some of the best friends of my life through it, and for that, I'm eternally grateful.
9. Music: Music was beyond an obsession for me from ages 16 to about 30. After my dad died and I got sick I was on so many mind and soul-numbing drugs I lost touch with music. I remember in college, asking my mom how she just wasn't obsessed with music. I loved it so much I tried to ruin it by going into the music business. I was young and naive. I wanted to be an A and R person. I didn't know that was mostly a male-dominated field - like being a talent scout. At the time I thought I'd want to spend my whole life in smoky clubs around bands. I didn't. But I have re-discovered music and is there anything closer to Heaven?
10. Art: I'd be an idiot if I didn't include this one. I slaved for four years to get a Master's Degree in the history of art. Even if I never teach it again (which would make me sad) I will always be grateful for the knowledge I have. I am moved beyond measure by Caravaggio's Christ, by van Gogh's gorgeous yellows, by Rembrandt's sweet son Titus, by Matisse's dancing nudes, by Berthe Morisot's thick brushstrokes...by Manet's saloon girl, and Monet's haystacks. Going to Europe AFTER I had taught art history for 6 years made the experience so much sweeter for ME. I don't know if other people care - or even know what they're missing by not having so much background info on the artists. Maybe it's like the Internet...you don't miss what you never had. But I think it makes my appreciation of it all so much richer.
That's all for now. I know I have about 20 more addictions and some are worse than others but my fingers are tired.
Sunday, March 08, 2009
All or Nothing
Last Thursday I was called to a rather dicey area (aren't they all) to sub for an 8th grade teacher. He teaches Honors English. Anyway, long story short...he's on jury duty and managed to get his ass on a jury. Great! I was there Friday and the last period of the day an actual fight broke out between two animals - I mean students - in my class. It's a long story but this one kid is just the living incarnation of Satan's spawn. He was already set to do 10 minutes of detention after school (the most I can give them without their parents' permission - as if most of these parents give a shit about these kids). He skipped out on both seeing the principal AND seeing me. He doesn't think he'll see me again. I can't wait to see his face tomorrow when security comes to escort him to the principal's office. He's also going to get an hour's detention for skipping out on the 10 minutes. Should've been a man and just sucked up the 10 minutes, dickhead. If only I could say that! What a bunch of waste cases.
I did get a paycheck for almost $800 for only 29 hours of work - which is why I put up with this shit in this economy. I just can't make this kind of money doing anything else. However, I think I'll be working all this week and I have those two damned English tests Saturday. There goes anymore intense studying. By the time I get home from that zoo I'm wiped.
I'm sorry to say this, but it is a zoo. These people have no manners. I've seen animals act with more dignity. I found a note about raping a girl on the floor the other day. It had no name on it. It also mentioned jacking off to her. These kids are the future of California. I hope I get out before I'm old, to paraphrase the Who.
I got my period today and I'm sooooooooooooooo tired I'm just dragging. The time change never helps me either (I just read Veleska's blog). I have to be at school at about 6:30 a.m. too an it's going to be pitch black. Jesus. I fucking HATE the time change. Why can't the government let well enough alone. We get like 8 months in the dark in the mornings now. If you're someone who has to get up really early like myself, it's like getting up at midnight. I feel like I'm walking into Starbucks at 1 am.
I've been lying in bed trying to study grammar. Could there be a more coma-inducing subject? I think not.
Last Thursday I was called to a rather dicey area (aren't they all) to sub for an 8th grade teacher. He teaches Honors English. Anyway, long story short...he's on jury duty and managed to get his ass on a jury. Great! I was there Friday and the last period of the day an actual fight broke out between two animals - I mean students - in my class. It's a long story but this one kid is just the living incarnation of Satan's spawn. He was already set to do 10 minutes of detention after school (the most I can give them without their parents' permission - as if most of these parents give a shit about these kids). He skipped out on both seeing the principal AND seeing me. He doesn't think he'll see me again. I can't wait to see his face tomorrow when security comes to escort him to the principal's office. He's also going to get an hour's detention for skipping out on the 10 minutes. Should've been a man and just sucked up the 10 minutes, dickhead. If only I could say that! What a bunch of waste cases.
I did get a paycheck for almost $800 for only 29 hours of work - which is why I put up with this shit in this economy. I just can't make this kind of money doing anything else. However, I think I'll be working all this week and I have those two damned English tests Saturday. There goes anymore intense studying. By the time I get home from that zoo I'm wiped.
I'm sorry to say this, but it is a zoo. These people have no manners. I've seen animals act with more dignity. I found a note about raping a girl on the floor the other day. It had no name on it. It also mentioned jacking off to her. These kids are the future of California. I hope I get out before I'm old, to paraphrase the Who.
I got my period today and I'm sooooooooooooooo tired I'm just dragging. The time change never helps me either (I just read Veleska's blog). I have to be at school at about 6:30 a.m. too an it's going to be pitch black. Jesus. I fucking HATE the time change. Why can't the government let well enough alone. We get like 8 months in the dark in the mornings now. If you're someone who has to get up really early like myself, it's like getting up at midnight. I feel like I'm walking into Starbucks at 1 am.
I've been lying in bed trying to study grammar. Could there be a more coma-inducing subject? I think not.
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