MadameBastet-Firing-Neurons

5am and Feeling It

I've 'worked' two Church gigs
mwp is a taskmaster
indentured servitude
dude, we dinae eat dinner!
had to watch the merch

5am and i can't sleep
everything hurts
cuz we folded shirts for two hours
and as hard as i worked sk's art
only one print sold
i feel like i failed him; he seemed sad when i told him

who the fuck took off
with the print cheat sheet?
morons.
now the real church merch person
is screwed and sk's art rep has to do it
all over again
sheesh
you go watch the band you paid to see
for a little while, you leave someone else
in charge and mayhem ensues
ok so it wasn't mayhem
just annoying crap.

so much to say, too tired to write
how do these guys do it
granted none have had the fms for 13 yrs
but still...i see the drug connection
you're tired but wired
you're down and out
but you're brain is running all about
did i give sk the right amount of $$$$
mwp is not only two places at once but
a million
you need downers to sleep
uppers to get up
you get very little sleep
you go home early hours of the morning
you're back at club at late afternoon
what a crazy way of life
gotta peek inside, fun for a couple of days
couldn't do it more than a week
check myself into mental ward

damn drunks
why do they come to these shows
to fuckin' talk louder than the band can play
some idiot chick talking so loud
mwp said, 'why can i hear one voice above everything else'
she shut it but people at the bar
drunk off their arses kept at it until
the entire henry fonda yelled SHUT UP!

people go home....
who's worse? them or the ones who keep
yelling "COLUMBUS"
i want to put a chair on their head
sk says "No but thank you for coming"
yeah like the band is gonna take alllllllllllllll
your requests
someone actually yelled 'shadow cabinet'
and i wished anyone who yelled out of order
would drop out of their seat into oblivion

i leave one inch of beer in a cup on the table
it takes less than a second for some chick to knock
it over and ruin my inventory sheets
hey lady, i spent all morning slaving over a hot excel
trying to cook those up for marty
cuz he ain't havin' nothing sold without inventory lists
good thing i made extra copies because i assume the worst!
and people never seem to disappoint

strange show tonight in holywood
weird vibe
pk lost half the day - where did run off to pk?
late late late for soundcheck
the infrastructure frayed
'we already did sound check w/o you'
sk says 'maybe he got arrested'
then later on stage bickering starts
i get nervous when anyone starts to argue
i am waiting for the war of the words but thankfully none come

during the show
pk starts in on 'a new season' and then stops
and says 'oh. maybe we should do grind.'
yeah, that's how the set was supposed to go.

steve says 'pk knows his way all over l.a.
but can't find his way around a set list.'
family squabbles, we've all been there, done that

in the middle of pk's song marty stops playing guitar
and looks like he's gonna bust an artery for a while
then hooks back into the song
don't know what went wrong there
mwp smiles a lot when playing guitar
i wondered, has he ever been really depressed?
i wonder a lot of strange things while watching people

tim left his drumkit twice - where did he go?
came back once, said he bought his ticket from
l.a. to auckland...very expensive...
ready to leave so soon tim?
leaving, i told tim, you were great, but stay at your drumkit buddy

don't know tim really but i like him
he seems grounded
i like his baseball cap
he's cute like a teddy bear
and nice

mwp played every instrument on stage practically
played us for foooooooooooools haha
steve says, 'denise, why are you letting mwp talk you into this'
well sk, it's kinda hard to say no to mwp
sk says 'you gotta say no'
friday i get to go as a fan
and i'd better not hear one dumbass yelling
columbus
but i know i will
heads will roll
no, the best ones are the idiots who yell "STEVE!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"MARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
if these poor guys had a dollar for everytime some shmuck yelled their
names they'd be living it up on the coast of some exotic isle
guess what dumbshits,
i think they know their names by now.

i do not do not do not
know how these guys do this
and after 25 years, all this
met robert rankin walker
who is one of the sweetest people i've ever met
hard to believe he's in the music biz, haha
not hard to look at either, but alas, married w/children
oh aren't they all
my ship has sailed? no, i'll catch one
someday
but my my my, he was a sweetheart who helped move
my table
mwp stuck me in the corner w/sk's prints like
'some bastard child' as robert said
so true!
robert came to visit me, kept me company
we had a delightful long talk about mwp's guitar playin' talents
and heyday records
his kids

tiare is a goddess
can't say enough good things about her
honoured my request for reserved seat
so as to live out dream of watching mwp
play the guitar up close and personal
sat directly in front of stage - in front of sk
and mwp
behind sk's friend jeffrey cain - another nice guy
was i loaded all night or were all these people just
really fuckin' great?
in another time, another place, it would be fun to
hang out with tiare
we did laugh and rant n rave about the bitch who runs the henry fonda
kept on us all night like white on rice
cuz the club takes a cut of all the merch sold
i went upstairs to her office to get some change and bitch
practically bit my head off
money-hungry viper
bitching about getting the t-shirts off the table
i said hey man, if she's in this business, late nights should be
expected
suck it up wicked witch of hollywood boulevard
seriously i mean i wanted to slap her in the face
in the car on the way home laughing said to g
'i should have just told her
anna, suck it bitch and calm the hell down.'
how crude!
did she kick out the band?
oh i can see sk being kicked out of somewhere - not!

sk had on some all black ensemble which suited him
very nicely
he looked sexy
and i say that full well knowing he is married w/kids
i have no intentions
he is just a sweet, moody, brilliant man w/socializing issues
but hey i'm a woman, i can admire the merchandise on stage, right?

mwp - you had the best hair in the business
going a little grey - aren't we all
if you don't wanna dye, ok
but please, i beg of you,
get a haircut, brush your hair and let your woman
introduce you to the wonders of conditioner

ha. he still plays the 12 string like some kind of
freakin' god. rubbin' his fingers in the lobby
i touched them - still so soft after all these years
charmed, he is
i left mwp with these words
you are awesome (how valley girl of me)
you are gonna miss us tomorrow night! (extreme sarcasm)
damn your bone structure
no i didnae say the last part
but seriously, damn chiseled face i would kill for
marty says "i'm so hungry"
so are we man, we had no dinnnnnnnnnnnnnnner
we are not bears who are hibernating
living off our fat, haha
we like to eat too.

i look forward to friday when we will not be indentured
and we'll be allowed to eat, watch the show, and mwp will
have new person to boss around for rest of tour, haha
no, he was pretty nice, just has his own method to his madness
i don't know how ONE girl is gonna handle ALL that merchandise
that's fuckin' insanity
we had 5 people working three tables
and shit still went down wrong

rob dickinson btw, is the sweetest human being ever
no hyperbole
really, really great guy
offered to get gena some dinner!
humble, gracious...he of the former band the catherine wheel
amazing voice
wondrous guitar
bought his cd - marched up in the crowd and said "Rob I have no time to be a fan, sign the CD" and he laughed and said "well you just get right to the point"
and he signed away graciously
he has a nutty stalker fan though and i was commanded to try
and keep her away from him
damn, fame, even small fame can be scary
what's with these people
rob is #1 classy guy in my book now; great girlfriend, all-around good people
he deserves mucho success

marjorie field opened up and hell they WERE good
i bought their cd from one of the band members and i swear
i think he was 12
but then again everyone looks about 12 to me these days
young band
but gonna go far
is that good or bad??
who knows.

went downstairs to do last task - give sk his money
i didn't trust anyone to do it, haha
sk seemed relax, hanging with friends, not bothered
i stayed only a minute
he thanked me and g
and was again a gentleman
thanks for the contact high
stevie.

surreal evening all around, but what else
can you expect from hollyweird
in the dead of night the dead, the drunk the demons
are out
we left the club and two guys walked by and yelled
'we love the church' at the top of their lungs
and i am
like
so
what
you have me mistaken with someone who gives a shit
young man.

must sleep. tutor coming soon. must have math mind.
we laughed our way home. so bloody hard i thought i
rearranged my organs
good laughter
didn't even have but half a beer
the sheer silliness of life on earth
enough to make you weep or laugh
and what the hell
laughter feels better in the end.

The band. Surprisingly human. ; )